If you have been giving of yourself, your resources, your time and energy to a relationship and not getting anything in return what have you not tried?
The definition of madness is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.
The person doing all the giving in a relationship is setting themselves up to always be in the role of “giver.” The other person who is usually doing very little to keep the relationship together has been programmed that they do not need to do anything as you are doing it all for them.
If you step back a bit they may, and usually do, pick up the slack and give back to you some more in time, affection, talking things through, etc but this usually ends as soon as you start giving again.
The more this cycle goes on the less likely you are to get as much back from your partner because they are learning just how much they have to give to keep you in their lives so that you are always doing more, feeling more and giving them the evidence that they have you 100% while you feel as if you are not sure where you stand with them.
Sound familiar? Sound fair?
One small step can go a long way. If you are the one always giving you need to come up with a solution that you have not used before.
You have to shake the other person up so much that they do not know what you will do next and they have no experience of this type of behaviour in you to fall back on so they know what to do to keep you attached to them.
This usually involves you pulling back and focusing your energy on your self and your own life. Can you do that?
by Chrisalis
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